By Carl and Sally Lauyan
My husband and I have been married for seven years now. Before we met God, our relationship was topsy turvy. We likened it to a yo-yo trick called “walking the dog” because it seemed we had more down moments than good times.
In those seven years, we were happy for the first two and half. But things got worse, and we hit rock bottom when he lost his job and we struggled financially. That brought about changes in our behavior and treatment toward each other. I also didn’t have a job then so we were greatly affected by that loss. On top of that, I discovered that my husband was experimenting with several destructive vices. He was into smoking, gambling, and worst of all, drugs. That was the lowest point of my life. I felt unloved and betrayed. I woke up each day with so much uncertainty for our family and our future.
A part of me wanted to end the relationship, but another part of me wanted to hold on so we could still have a whole family. That reason became my motivation to keep on forgiving my husband despite his failures. I vowed to do everything to change him, but my efforts went down the drain. He continued to rely on drugs and his other vices. I was devastated and believed that giving up would be the best option. I began asking God why He gave me this kind of husband whom I expected to be my friend, provider, comforter, and lifetime partner. He seemed to be my worst nightmare. I had no one to turn to. I realized that I couldn’t change my husband through my own actions. At that time, God was the only one I could turn to for help.
After much prayer, I felt God was moving in our midst. I met people who became instrumental in the restoration of my relationship with God and with my husband. They helped us in every area of our lives. Eventually, we were invited to the Art of Marriage video event in our church in Bacolod.
That seminar taught us valuable lessons on respect and love toward your spouse. I realized that we were like other couples too, in need of God’s intervention and grace. It encouraged us to join other FamilyLife seminars and ministries such as the HomeBuilders series hosted by our lifegroup leaders. We realized that we had so many failures as husband and wife. One of those was that we didn’t make God the center of our relationship. But through these seminars, we were constantly reminded that no marriage will ever work unless He is at the center of it all.
I thank God for how He rescued us out of the darkness and has given us a chance to enjoy life and have peace in our home. God is indeed a living God at work in our lives. He makes all things beautiful. Today, my husband has been freed from his addiction and we are helping other couples going through the same struggles we endured. Our trials became a launching pad for us to help others and display God’s amazing grace and love toward other families.